so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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