My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
