it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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