i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
