the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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