I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize