Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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