Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
