chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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