1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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