Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
