You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
