What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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