Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Randomize
