You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
