let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
