K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
