Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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