have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
