Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
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