I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
