she was so not down for the gang bang
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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