Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen

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(860): View more from Connecticut

New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache

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(815): View more from Illinois

should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(701): View more from North Dakota

entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place

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(605): View more from South Dakota

We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.

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(630): View more from Illinois

The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is

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