Texts From Last Night

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  (530): View more from California

  Those balls look pretty dangerous.

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  (530): Those balls look pretty dangerous. http://tfl.nu/vdt4
  Replies (6) Good night (2922) Bad night (882)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression

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  (215): I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression http://tfl.nu/rcf4
  Replies (5) Good night (614) Bad night (3909)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?

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  (865): is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend? http://tfl.nu/lq8q
  Replies (85) Good night (17966) Bad night (1325)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I need a leather bustier to keep them in.

  (925): View more from California

  Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.

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  (406): I need a leather bustier to keep them in. (925): Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that. http://tfl.nu/8m96
  Replies (26) Good night (6133) Bad night (780)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has

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  (519): She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has http://tfl.nu/fgce
  Replies (14) Good night (3540) Bad night (777)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding

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  (313): There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding http://tfl.nu/91sj
  Replies (16) Good night (1453) Bad night (3620)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?

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  (563): I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one? http://tfl.nu/bi5f
  Replies (11) Good night (1338) Bad night (833)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.

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  (414): If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg. http://tfl.nu/31ua
  Replies (2) Good night (1330) Bad night (665)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?

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  (425): Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios? http://tfl.nu/2jhx
  Replies (13) Good night (488) Bad night (1349)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions

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  (717): I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions http://tfl.nu/aecl
  Replies (5) Good night (594) Bad night (493)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.

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  (303): Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent. http://tfl.nu/patp
  Replies (2) Good night (980) Bad night (494)
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  (408): View more from California

  You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt

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  (408): You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt http://tfl.nu/y49e
  Replies (2) Good night (958) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....

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  (406): And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night.... http://tfl.nu/0vfo
  Replies (0) Good night (402) Bad night (227)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.

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  (612): I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone. http://tfl.nu/naxz
  Replies (1) Good night (242) Bad night (406)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.

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  (360): I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin. http://tfl.nu/4get
  Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (159)

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