My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.