why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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