Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
