You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Houston, we have a squirter
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
