I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
