I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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