I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
