It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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