Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
