i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
