i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
