Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize