definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
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And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
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Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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