im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
