so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize
