youre lurking in front of me
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
