she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
