never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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