btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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