I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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