This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
The air taste purple.
Randomize
