Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
