so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
be right there i have to get my cape
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize
