Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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