dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
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you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
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its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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