Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
