Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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