I am spending my child support on dildos
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize