there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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